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By Rabbi Micha Berger "A light is sown for the righteous, and happiness for the straight of heart.” (Psalms 97:11) We all want happiness, so the promise of happiness sown in advance for the “straight of heart” is one that piques my interest. What does it mean to be “straight”, or in Hebrew, “yashar”? If it’s the way to get happiness, I want in. Admittedly Hebrew has many words for happiness, each different in connotation. Here we are speaking of simchah. Other forms of happiness (sason, gilah, rinah), such as the joy of hearing good news, are much harder to reach. One can’t feel such joy without arranging the world in a way that constantly provides weddings, births, bar mitzvahs, and other good news. Similarly, the pursuit of happiness through entertainment keeps us happy only while entertained. It starts fading as soon as the curtain goes down. The pursuit is endless and all-encompassing, the goal unreachable.
Why is that joke funny? After all it’s a tale of a couple whose marriage is at risk. Look how little she thinks of him. Where is our empathy? Why did the story evince a chuckle, or groan, rather than sadden us? Because as we read, we build one picture of the couple: happily enjoying their anniversary, hand-in-hand on vacation. The last line provides a total shift, an unexpected truth about the story. The need for suddenness is why timing is so central to comedy. And so it is that we laugh when we get a sudden insight into the truth. as Rav Saadia Gaon (Babylonia 882-942 CE) observes. He also maintains that simchah is the kind of happiness most related to laughter. Just as laughter derives from truth, so does happiness. There is a well known verse in the Mishnah by Ben Zoma, which tells us, “Who is wealthy? Someone who is happy with his lot.” (Avot 4:1) When someone, G-d forbid, loses a family member, they say a blessing, “Blessed be the True Judge.” And the Talmud explains that “Just as we bless over the good, so too we bless over tragic.” In other words, everything has a place in our lives, both the joyous times and the times of struggle, of challenges, of growth. They are all parts of our lot in life. Wealth is being able to be happy to have what you have and to come to terms with not having what you don’t. The happy person knows that his life has a purpose and understands that G-d has a reason why his lot is his. This is someone who is connected to the underlying truth and can therefore weather anything and put it into perspective. This is the one who is yashar or “straight,” following a direct path from where he is to where his life should go. He is an idealist, living with an eye to the ultimate truth. G-d does not bestow happiness on him as a gift, rather it is inherent, “sown,” by his actions. This is not an abstruse truth. We can all think of people in our communities who spend their time volunteering in the soup kitchen or are always there when a friend needs a hand. Or the couple who invests everything to give their special-needs child every advantage to reach his or her potential. And they sweat through the work and sometimes curse in frustration. But taking the long view, over the course of their lives, they somehow are the happiest among us. Bitachon, our trust in G-d, can give us the tools to be wealthy as Ben Zoma defines true wealth. Knowing that everything that enters and exits our lives is by G-d’s intent. They are stepping stones along a path He lays for us. Tools to help us accomplish, or challenges through which to grow. Someone who lives life by that plan is yashar, straight, incorporating these things into his life rather than trying to live around them. By becoming yashar, by elevating our Mussar lessons into a lifestyle, one can grasp the keys to happiness. |
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